By: Butz Muyco
Photo credits: Vernon Jio Viajar and Ron Christopher Neri
The first lessons in life are not learned in school, but at home, where good character is first shaped.
For Bae Gelyn Cabriadas Manginsay, raising children is more than providing them with food, clothing, and education. For her, the greater responsibility is nurturing their values and character, the qualities they will carry with them throughout their lives.
Bae Gelyn, 64, is a resident of Barangay Consuelo in Bunawan, Agusan del Sur, within the Bunawan Manobo Ancestral Domain. She is the fourth of nine siblings and the daughter of the late Datu Marcelino Cabriadas, who served as Barangay Captain of Consuelo before the enactment of the Indigenous Peoples’ Rights Act (IPRA).
Public service has long been part of her life. Although she only finished third year high school, she began serving her community as a Purok Chairman at the age of 31. She later served as a Barangay Kagawad from 2003 to 2008 and has been the Treasurer of the Consuelo Tribal Agro-Forestry Multi-Purpose Cooperative (COTAMCO) since 2001. Today, she serves as a member of the Council of Elders (COE) of the Bunawan Manobo Ancestral Domain Management Council, Inc. (BMADMCI), a role that reflects the community’s trust in her experience, wisdom, and integrity.
Yet among all the responsibilities she has carried through the years, motherhood remains the one she treasures most.
Bae Gelyn and her husband were blessed with seven children-four daughters and three sons, all of whom finished their education and now have families of their own. Looking back, she sees a clear difference between how she was raised and how she chose to raise her own children.
“My parents were very strict. I was not allowed to go anywhere by myself, and I was forbidden from attending community dances. One time, my younger sibling and I secretly climbed out of the window to go anyway. Before long, my father arrived to fetch us, and we already knew that a guava tree branch would be waiting for us when we got home, as a punishment.”
She believes the discipline she experienced helped shape her character. Children of her generation, she recalls, were taught to respect their parents and elders, obey instructions, and help with household and farm work. But while she appreciated the values she learned growing up, she also chose a different approach when she became a mother herself.
“Although I grew up in a time when corporal punishment was common, I did not raise my own children the same way. Instead, my husband and I taught them good values according to our customs. We made sure that even if we could not give them material wealth, they would grow up disciplined, loving, and caring. We always made time to talk to them, ask about their studies, and know who their friends were.”
For Bae Gelyn, open communication is one of the most effective ways parents can guide their children. She believes parenting today has become more challenging because of the influence of the internet, gadgets, peer pressure, and other distractions that can shape the attitudes and behavior of young people.
Despite these challenges, she remains convinced that parents play the most important role in keeping their children from harmful influences, vices, and choices that could jeopardize their future.
“We, as parents, carry a great responsibility. If we fail to raise our children well, it is not only our family that will suffer, but the community as well.”
For this reason, she believes that children should experience love, care, guidance, and faith in God from an early age.
“As parents, we should learn to observe and understand our children. Even when they say they are ‘okay,’ they may be carrying burdens they cannot express. We need to be there to listen and understand.”
Today, as a member of the Council of Elders of the BMADMCI, the same values she worked hard to instill in her children are the values she hopes to pass on to her community. For Bae Gelyn, strong families build strong communities. It is at home where children first learn love, respect, discipline, responsibility, and faith in God.
“It brings me great joy to see my children now living good lives and to watch my grandchildren grow up on the right path. Raising them was never easy, especially sending them to school. But through hard work, helping one another, and always trusting in God, we were able to overcome every challenge.”
For Bae Gelyn, the greatest legacy parents can leave behind is not the wealth they accumulate but the character they build in their children. After all, good character does not develop overnight. It is shaped at home, where children first experience love, guidance, and the power of good example.
The BMADMCI is an Indigenous Peoples Organization (IPO) within the Bunawan Manobo Ancestral Domain that is being supported by the Mindanao Inclusive Agriculture Development Project (MIADP) through the Regional Project Coordination Office XIII.
